Twelve Tips On How To Be Selfless
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Should you be selfless and put the needs of others before your own?
Well, no, but it’s a thin line, and being selfless actually means having the will to help others without expecting anything in return. Not only will it give you a lot of satisfaction, but you will also be kinder.
Look up selflessly online, and one of the first definitions is “one who acts without thinking for his own good”. From there, you can ask yourself how many times you shop without just thinking about what’s in it for you, what suits you and what makes you feel good.
The importance of thinking this way
Being selfless allows you to better understand the world from other perspectives and visualize problems, attitudes and reactions from a different point of view. It is not easy to develop the tendency to help without thinking about yourself first, but it is definitely rewarding.
According to Allan Luks and Peggy Payne’s book, The Healing Power of Doing Good: The Health and Spiritual Benefits of Helping Others , selflessness reduces stress and improves emotional balance.
In addition, the satisfaction is not only immediate, but comes every time you remember the caring action. It increases your self-esteem, self-confidence and socialization ability, and you also give yourself back to your environment.
Tips for you can be selfless
Spend a few minutes reflecting on how you can be supportive without feeding your ego whenever you can. Do you find it difficult? Keep reading, the following tips may make it easier.
1. Be empathetic
Being selfless goes beyond your own thoughts, beyond just focusing on your feelings and what you want. It is not about self-absorption, but about listening and understanding others, knowing what makes them feel good or bad. It will help you recognize some ways you can shed some light on their lives.
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2. Listen more and talk less
One way to show interest in someone is to listen to them, especially if they want to share an achievement or air their problems.
Ask them how their day was going, and give them a chance to express themselves and relieve burdens. You will find that during the conversation they will want to hear from you as well.
3. Do not criticize
Be constructive, instead of emphasizing the bad. There are many ways to say the same thing, and it is better to give a constructive opinion if yours is not positive. Emphasize what is good and encourage it.
4. Love yourself
It is impossible to love others if you do not love yourself. Authentic selflessness begins when you love yourself and you can only love others from there. One way to do that is to be grateful for who you are.
5. It is not always good to emphasize oneself
It is not wrong to be generous; what is unpleasant is to exalt oneself or expect rewards for goodness. Let the facts speak for themselves when you do some altruistic work and help someone in need. It makes your actions more special.
6. Give what you want yourself
For example, start with the family and give them something nice. Small actions facilitate larger gestures. No, you do not have to please others, but you will understand how good it feels when you do.
7. Cultivate patience
Selfless people tend to practice patience, a desirable trait to avoid frustration or anger. Therefore, do not despair to try to get further ahead, your time will come.
There is no point in getting upset with those in front of you in the queue; Remember it could be you. Start a conversation instead; it is more entertaining for everyone.
8. Say “no” less often
It is more fulfilling to say “yes”, so be positive when a situation that does not involve any risk or danger, and which brings joy and happiness. Usually you have something to give or a way to help. So why not do it if it has great significance for the one who needs it!
9. Let it flow
Having control over what happens is not so important. You achieve more when you let it flow and allow yourself to be amazed at what the road to the goal has to offer. You will eventually see how rewarding it is to help.
10. Reflect on your behavior
Take time to reflect on habits, thoughts and actions. Review the way you treat yourself and how you treat others. Also analyze if you could have given or loved more.
Do not do it as a punishment, just to make the next day better. Some psychologists recommend mettā meditation of loving kindness to work on your feelings.
11. Follow a selfless role model
Imitate the example of a person or character you admire and perceive as selfless. Understand how they help others and how their actions affect so many lives. There are many good examples to follow out there.
12. Forgive from the heart
Do not resent those who ask for forgiveness. Visualizing what happened from a different perspective helps to be compassionate. It is not easy to forgive someone who hurt you, but it is a big step towards selflessness and peaceful coexistence.
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The value of being selfless
Ultimately, it is to be selfless to treat others the way you want to be treated, without harming them in any way to your own advantage. In fact, the value is proven in personal growth and selflessness for the welfare of others.
In addition, do not wait for a specific time for action and be generous daily. For example, offer a seat to an elderly or pregnant person on the bus, donate the clothes you no longer wear, keep the elevator door open for someone to join, say hello when you enter a place and wish people a good day.
These everyday gestures nourish your mind, spirit and emotions as you make them from the heart without expecting recognition.